Lately, I seem to be surrounded by people with broken hearts. One’s my best friend, one’s my sister, two are friends from work…

It can be pretty depressing, but I have one thing to say to every one of them. They are all going to be okay. Even if “it’s the type of experience that changes one person forever”.

I think every experience molds us into who we become. The pain however deep it is at the moment will slowly fade, maybe not completely, but it will become something we can handle. Or maybe we just become stronger and more capable of handling the pain and all it brings.

So, if you are in despair right now, hang in there. You are going to be okay.

I switched! Finally! Now I’ve got the most recent release of WordPress because I’m ON WordPress! Thanks to all the convicing from T (coupled with the fact that my free webhost package is expiring soon and I didn’t want to pay for it). Well, I actually have to thank more than T’s convincing. He did the porting himself. I tried, but didn’t have the patience for it, given that I tried working on it at 10:30 last night. But because T’s on vacation, he did it himself! Thanks, T!!! My blog owes you one.

Just a word of advice, if you’re in an office with cubicles and no doors, do not, by any means, clip your nails at work. That’s gross. Now, if only I could say this out loud…

So I did my two presentations yesterday. The first one with the managers went well, I thought, and everyone said I did great. Of course, the VP mentioned in the introduction that it was my first time presenting, and asked everyone to be supportive of me. So, maybe they were just saying that to be nice. But everyone got a laugh after my presentation because after I was done I shot right to my seat, when we’re supposed to ask if there are any questions. Well, I just completely spaced out and forgot, and it wasn’t really because I was avoiding questions… at least not consciously.

Before the afternoon presentations, one of the managers said that I did a good job presenting earlier, but wasn’t myself - that I was tight and wasn’t even smiling. So, I made it a point to try and be comfortable while I was up talking, and I even tried to involve the audience a little. They weren’t very responsive though. He said it was better, and I seemed more relaxed, but I also know that I missed some points in the afternoon presentation. Oh well. Can’t win.

It’s funny though, everyone was saying I was going to do a great job. The engineering manager, my manager, the VP of engineering, etc. I had my own little cheering squad. It pays to have so little confidence sometimes, because people just pour out their support. It was a little encouraging, but not necessarily helpful, because I knew myself too regardless of what they think I can do.

But I got through it, 4 Pepto Bismol tablets later. Whew. It’s been a very stressful week. And now it’s back to normal work…

Not like some people I know (i.e., Glenn, Ate, T) who tend to not eat when stressed or sad or depressed, I eat. I eat non-stop.

I’ve been eating non-stop since Friday. I think I’m sick to my stomach today because I’m so full. And I’m still eating.

Actually, the weekend was just an eating weekend. I had two parties in a row - Friday and Saturday, and then brunch on Sunday. So I had to eat regardless of the stress-factor anyway.

BUT, I haven’t been able to stop eating since! Geez.

And now, I have a 2 big presentations to prepare for on Wednesday next week. One for managers and the owners of the company, and another one for my fellow engineers. Apparently, they want me to be acknowledged for the work I put into this UI project. They’re trying to do me a favor, but not really. My stress levels are off the mark right now. I think they’re secretly trying to make me gain a few pounds to make me truly fit into the company profile.

And my UI professor still won’t talk to me.

The End.

I love the winter sky.

An unexpected, sincere smile can make my day.

System of a Down gets me pumped while running.

Painting, while frustrating can sometimes be liberating and the results surprising.

No reason for the post. I’m sleepy. I hope I have an excellent dream tonight.